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Being a Muslim's Wife

By Abdullah Al Araby

Jump to:  Your Status    Your Marriage   Your Sex Life
Your Children  
Your Future    Before You Say "I Do"

He is asking for your hand in marriage, and you have fallen in love with his bronze Middle Eastern complexion. He is intelligent, rich, well-educated and well-mannered. So, what more can a woman ask for?...THIS MOST ELIGIBLE BACHELOR IS ALSO A MUSLIM!

"There will be no problems" he will say, "you can keep your religion, I will keep mine". And while it is true that Islam allows a Muslim man to marry a Christian woman, is it true that there will be no problems in such a marriage?

To answer this question, a woman has to examine what it is like to be a Muslim's wife

Your Status

  • Islam teaches that men are superior to women." Surah 2:228
  • Islam teaches that women have half the rights of men:
    • In court witness Surah 2:282
    • In inheritance Surah 4:11
  • Islam considers the wife a possession. "Fair in the eyes of men is the love of things they covet: women and sons, heaped-up hoards of gold and silver; horses..." Surah 3:14
  • Islam instructs women to veil themselves always when they are outside their homes" and say to the believing women...that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty"Surah 24:31
  • Mohammed teaches that women are lacking in mind and religion "I have not seen any one more deficient in intelligence and religion than women" Al Bukhary vol. 2:541
  • Muhammed teaches that women are a bad omen. "Bad omen is in the women, the house and the horse" Al Bukhary vol. 7:30
  • Mohammed teaches that women are harmful to men "After me I have not left any affliction more harmful to men than women" Al Bukhary vol.7:33

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Your Marriage

  • Islam allows polygamy: A man may marry up to four wives at one time. "Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four... " Surah 4:3
  • A man can divorce his wife by oral announcement, the wife has no such right. "Divorce is permissible twice" Surah 2:229
  • When a husband has pronounced divorce three times on his wife, she then may not lawfully remarry her husband until she has married and been divorced by another man (including having sexual intercourse with him). "...So if a husband divorces his wife he cannot after that, remarry her until after she has married another husband, and he has divorced her" Surah 2:230
  • Islam teaches that a wife is subject to punishment by her husband, beating a wife or abstaining from sexual relations with her is allowed. "As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them, refuse to share their beds, beat them... " Surah 4:34

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Your Sex Life

Islam considers the wife a sex object. "your wives are as a tilth (a field to be ploughed) unto you, so approach your tilth when or how ye will " Surah 2:223

Your Children

Your children have to be raised according to their Muslim father's religion: Islam. If he divorces you, he gets custody of the children, and you wouldn't be able to see your children again.

The Sharia (Islamic Law) states that in mixed marriages "the children will follow the better of the two religions of their parents", which in your case is considered Islam. The Quran states that Islam is the only true religion, "The religion before Allah is Islam" Surah 3:19. Non Muslims can not act as protectors to Muslims, "O ye who believe; take not for friends (protectors) unbelievers rather than believers" Surah 4:144

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Your Future

Should you survive your Muslim husband, and his wealth is in an Islamic country, the Islamic law will apply. The wife who has not converted to Islam gets nothing, the wife who has converted to Islam gets very little. According to the Quran a Muslim wife does not inherit all her husband's wealth. If the husband dies and he leaves no children, she gets a fourth of his wealth, his parents, brothers, uncles...etc will get the rest. If the deceased husband leaves children, then the wife gets an eighth, the children get the rest; the male child gets double the portion of the female. "In what ye leave, their (wives) share is a fourth if you leave no child; but if you leave a child, they (wives) get an eighth ; after payment of legacies and debts." Surah 4:12

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Before You Say "I DO"

Before you commit yourself to marry a Muslim, it is a good idea to examine the motives behind it. While your motive may be love, his motive could be just to obtain a "Green Card".

I know, they say "love is blind", I hope however that this message will serve as an eye- opener for you.

You may say that your husband-to-be is a non-practicing Muslim. But let's not forget that Islam is more than a religion; it includes a complete legal code for Muslims and non- Muslims to follow in an Islamic State. In case of a dispute between you and him, all he needs to do to get the upper hand over you is to travel to an Islamic country.

If you are still in doubt about this, may I suggest that you see the movie "Not without my daughter" which is based on a true life story of an American woman who married a Muslim man.  Other similar movies are:  "Princess, Dreams of Trespass, and The Stoning of Soraya M?"

This may be a life-saving experience. The lives you will save are your own, and those of your future children.

"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?" 2 Corinthians 6:14

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